.sometimes the only sane answer to an insane world is insanity.

An Ode To My Favourite Red Head...

Sat, 09 Aug 2008 05:59:00 GMT

For those of you who don't know (shame. SHAME. EPIC SHAME! on you), today is August 9th, aka...

GILLIAN ANDERSON'S 40TH BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

40? Seriously? She looks younger than me. They must have put something in the water on the XF set because ~~Mitch, Chris, David, and~~ Gillian should be in the Guiness World Record Book for the best aging person in the world.

Thought the 40th birthday of my favourite girl deserved a lovely picspam so here it is! And I even kept all Scully pics away! (I save those for Scully's birthday :) ) But damn, this was hard! Narrowing down 40 pics of this unbelievable photogenic and gorgeous lady took me a long time, but I think I have picked the best. My best anyways. So, continue for the pics (in completely random order) and extremely unimportant and fangirly explanations of the pictures...

Honestly wish I could put this entire shoot in here. Her expressions! Her hair! ~~Her rack!~~ It's all love

Because it's the 2nd best RS cover ever...which I now own a signed copy of (cue jealousy)

Gillian in Vogue. Yeah.

How can you not love this photo!? It is so crazy and random and I love any shot of her that is alieny and weird. If anyone ever asks you why GA is a sex symbol to sci fi geeks everywhere, show them this.

Simple. Beautiful. And her eyes are intense.

I absolutely love this photo. Rarely does she rock the ponytail and it looks stunning.

I love when she looks nerdy.

Another simple shot. I personally think she looks the best without all the makeup.

But then again, she looks FUCKING AWESOME in tons of makeup. Best. Cover. Ever.

I love her hair. I can't get over it so don't expect me to.

Gillian and Cat in a photo...together. Nuff' said.

First in many of the directing shots I shall throw in here. Just because I love 'all things'. And her.

My fav colour on her.

Another of the most favourites. I loveeee when she goes all Scully in RL.

Messy + Curly + Red = *dies*

My alltime fav picture. Incredible.

This shot is genius. The entire Esquire shoot was genius, but this pic in perticular.

Some more amazing art direction. Gilly standing in front of a billboard of Scully...awesome.

Why you be so cute?

Hee. This pic makes me happy. I kind of have an obession with all the Wondercon pictures, I don't really know why.

Um, adopt me?

I love Bleak House and she looks so soap opery in this one.

I adore her quirky neck touch thing.

She looks damn good behind a camera.

FAVE <3

Again with the neck thing

Her expressions kill me. I'm pretty sure no one else in life looks this pretty when making this face.

I loved that hair on her...and she makes black and white colourful (it makes sense, I swear)

I can hear that infamous giggle whenever I look at this picture.

:) (such a great comment, eh?)

How could I not put this picture here?

That colour! Always wear it, seriously.

The smile, the hand placement, the belly....<3

Another of my top favs...she can interrogate me anytime ;)

The making of The Scully Hair!

I love how tiny she is.

I could honestly only use this picture for icons for the rest of my life and be happy.

Such a Renaissance girl

So soft and pretty. Everything just accentuates her in this photo and I really like it.

I left this one for last for a reason. It isn't from a magazine, she isn't wearing a glamourous dress, and she isn't in a fancy pose, but it is a lovely shot of her because it exudes what she is as a person. Africa is so important to her and this photo completely embodies what she works for and believes in her life and I love it for that.

To Gillian, on her birthday. You are one of the most underrated and underappreciated actor's of your time but the ones who have been privilidged enough to stumble upon and enjoy your work are extremely fortunate. I know you may not have an Ivy League education, razor sharp wit, or an almost PhD from Yale, but what you do have is far greater than that. Your talents in the arts is something that cannot be taught, no matter the number of classes or what kind of school you go to. You say more with a glance than most actors can with 2 hours of dialogue and you emote things I never even knew I could be made to feel. Dana Scully is an icon, maybe even moreso than Fox Mulder. Dana Scully showed me how to be brave, how to face unbelievable tragedy and how to see the light in the darkest of times. She explained the struggle between heart and mind, science and belief, and what kind of dreamsicle is the best kind. She made it okay to be a strong and independant woman who could both kick ass and break hearts while wearing killer pumps. But most of all, Dana Scully made me believe. In myself, in love, and in everything else. Gillian is a role model I am not afraid to have and I can only pray that those who look up to the Miley Cirus' of the world can one day see the light and experience what I have and am still currently having.

So thank you, Gillian. For Scully. For you. Here's to 40 more years!

And if you are still reading this, please visit the following sites and support Gillian's charities! (Support doesn't have to mean money, just read up! Learn the facts.)

www.nfinc.org.

www.buskaid.org.za

"I hope everyone that is reading this is having a really good day. And if you are not, just know that in every new minute that passes you have an opportunity to change that."

if you can make it here, you'll make it anywhere

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 18:34:24 GMT

Sitting in my hotel room in NYC and decided to post some Gillian prettiness! Icons and headers beyond the cut. Hope you like and tell me what you think!

ETA: added another header...

Icons









Headers

Season One XF Icons

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 19:19:55 GMT

Made up a batch of XF icons from Season One - one per episode. Also made a f/o banner too, just for fun. Comments are love and credit is appreaciated. Enjoy!

Season One

Another Fanmix...

Sat, 26 Jul 2008 00:12:58 GMT

Well, number one, saw the movie last night and jhfonsiognosndgosng*flail*ksjnfosdnfsngoign*squee*jshfkdjnfjdng*dies*. Pretty much sums it up but I will give an appropriate and coherent response to it after seeing it again tonight!!! All I have to say right now is that Gillian Anderson = amazing. Totally Scully's movie, no doubt.

Now, on to business. Got a great reception from my last fanmix so I thought I would make another one (yay rapidshare finally worked!) ! So, here it is!

http://rapidshare.com/files/132476005/MSR_Mix_2.zip.html

1. Untouched - The Veronicas
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/veronicas/untouched.html

2. What A Day - Greg Laswell
http://www.lyricsandsongs.com/song/894851.html

3. Challengers - The New Pornographers
http://www.completealbumlyrics.com/lyric/132029/New+Pornographers+-+Challengers.html

4. Everything - Lifehouse
http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/l/lifehouse/everything.html

5. The Secret's In The Telling - Dashboard Confessional
http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/The-Secret's-In-The-Telling-lyrics-Dashboard-Confessional/AD7E41B66B91A3CB4825718F00148D7B

6. Always Be My Baby - David Cook
http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/d/david_cook/always_be_my_baby.html

7. Forever And Ever Amen - 8MM
http://www.metrolyrics.com/forever-and-ever-amen-lyrics-8mm.html

8. Hometown Glory - Adele
http://www.metrolyrics.com/hometown-glory-lyrics-adele.html

9. On Your Side - Graham Colton
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/grahamcolton/onyourside.html

10. Modern Mystery - Someone Still Loves You, Boris Yeltsin
http://recycledlovesongs.com/indie-music/someone-still-loves-you-boris-yeltsin-modern-mystery-lyrics

11. Out Of My League - Stephen Speaks
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/stephenspeaks/outofmyleague.html

12. Revival - Soulsavers
http://www.lyricsandsongs.com/song/861563.html

13. Such Great Heights - Iron And Wine
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/gardenstate/suchgreatheights.htm

14. Unsaid - The Fray
http://www.elyrics.net/read/f/fray-lyrics/unsaid-lyrics.html

15. Today Has Been Okay - Emiliana Torrini
http://music.zortam.com/songs94/1201232-song-zortam.php

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 17:03:15 GMT

Credit for the banner to lovelei

X-Files Icon Dump!

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 03:45:08 GMT

Made a bunch of X-Files icons, follow the link!

http://community.livejournal.com/xfiles/2094434.html#cutid1

New Fic ahhh!!

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 03:33:38 GMT

So, lovelies, I've decided to start a new story! This time it is Mulder/Scully from The X-Files of course. I'm a little scared about writing them because their relationship and minds are so deep and dark and twisty that it is quite a challenge, so let me know what you think! <3

Title: Sway
Author: Stephanie
Part: 1/?
Summary: Inspired by the 'what I miss about working with Scully" promo for XF2. Basically my thoughts on what has happened between the end of The Truth and now.
Spoilers: Slight movie spoilers but not really. More speculation, and not popular speculation so don't hate me ahh! It's for fic purposes only heh.
Disclaimer: CC: All Me: Zero

As tough as wanting something can be,
the people who suffer the most,
are the ones who don’t know what they want.
-Meredith Grey

-------------------------

7:25 glared ominously at Mulder as he opened his eyes and squinted at the red numbering of the clock. He had been awake most of the night which was typical for him as he never slept much. But what wasn’t typical was the reason for the restlessness; the cause of his torment. It hadn’t been one of those dark nights that he spent red-eyed at the screen of his laptop researching, or the kind where he watched old movies just for kicks and insomnia. He had had a dream. He had had THAT dream, the recurring dream that only seemed to show up once or twice a year; on her birthday, their anniversary, or just some nights when his loneliness ate at him from the inside out. She would be standing there, in his…their room, wearing his old t-shirt that hung loosely off her body. He would look up and smile at her and she would return it before climbing into bed beside him and holding him close. That was usually the time when his brain jolted awake, not allowing the fantasy to go on for too long. Mulder would wake up shaken and sweaty, swearing he could feel the aftereffects of her warm touch on his cheek or the spot where her breath had traced along his neck. He felt she had really been there but when he would look beside him the bed was still empty and he was still alone. This was one of those nights, those dreaded nights, but the worst thing was that he dreaded the day to come more. He would be willing to dream about her every night rather than face what he was about to in the coming hours.

Letting out a muffled groan, Mulder ran his hands across his face, pausing slightly to massage his forehead before his fingers trailed roughly through his hair. He got off the bed and made way to the bathroom, turning the tap on and flushing the toilet after he performed his usual morning ritual. The hot water screamed into the sink as vapors floated upwards and into his nostrils as he inhaled deeply.

He thought back to the day he got the phone call. The way that FBI agent’s voice shook as she spoke to him softly and slowly, because she was talking to Agent Fox Mulder. The legend. The ghost. He smirked as he listened to her but quickly enough their roles were reversed as Scully’s name rolled effortlessly off of her tongue, causing his voice to be the one to quiver. She had called her Dana at first and he was quick to correct, probably more sternly then he should have but she had not earned the right to call her that. He wondered how someone could speak of her so whimsically, as if they were talking about Bob or Sarah from down the street. She was so much more than just a name in an FBI case file and when talking about her you could clearly tell the difference between those who know her and those who don’t. While pondering all of this he missed most of the what the young girl had said to him but in the end just replied with an ‘alright’ and clasped his cell phone shut.

Mulder turned the water off and the steam cleared from the mirror just in time for him to look up and see his pitiful reflection staring back. He wishes he had of listened more closely to what was being asked of him, thought about it more sensibly. Truth be told, he would’ve probably said yes anyways because everyone knows he couldn’t resist an opportunity like this, but if he had of processed it more at least today wouldn’t have hit him like a train. ‘Today’, he thought as he stepped into the shower. The day him and Scully would be reunited. In the professional sense only, of course, because it would take a lot more then recruitment from a rookie agent to reunite them emotionally. Looking into the showerhead, he tried to let the water wash away the memories of the last time he had seen Scully.

***

“Don’t take this case, Mulder” Scully pleaded with him, her voice calm but keeping in a consistent, authoritative tone.

“I have to,” he answered, barely paying attention to her as he browsed the email he had received a day before, detailing events that were happening in a small town near Montana and that had immediately sparked a fire in him.

“You don’t have to. It’s just like the hundreds of others you’ve had in the past year that end up being completely scientifically explainable,” she huffed.

“This one could be different.”

“They are never different. Always the same and you know it. It’s the one damn constant in our lives.”

“So what then? You want me to just give up on everything?” Mulder questioned her.

“I didn’t say that.”

“Then what did you say?”

“I want you here, Mulder.” Scully admitted, not verbally saying much but the look in her eyes saying a lot more.

“I know and I want to be here, but I can’t let this one pass. You know if I do all I will think is what if this was the one?” he answered, looking at her for approval.

“I can’t come with you.”

“Of course you’re coming with me. Ride together, die together. Cradle to grave…or whatever that saying is,” Mulder said with a slight laugh but Scully’s face remained unimpressed and stationary.

“I’m not joking around this time. I’m done with this life. I’m moving on.” Mulder had known this was coming. The moment she would have enough. He could feel it weeks away and had been dreading it ever since. This wasn’t the life she wanted, as much as she said she did. And now she was regretting choosing him.

“Mulder, stop. Stop running through scenarios of how much I regret being here. I can see it all over your face.”

“Well, it’s the truth, isn’t it?”

“No, it’s not and you know that.” Scully said in a soft tone.

“Then why won’t you come with me?” Mulder asked innocently.

“Because. I want to go back to being a doctor. Being normal. I’ve had enough of the chase Mulder, but that doesn’t mean in the slightest that I’ve had enough of you.”

“What happened to ‘it’s us fighting this fight, not you’”? He was pushing her buttons purposefully but he was angry and couldn’t stop himself.

“It’s still us. I’m not going anywhere.” Scully responded, frustrated.

“No, and you aren’t coming anywhere either. You are just going to stay here alone?”

Her silence was more of an answer then he was looking for as he searched her face. What did she want from him? Why did she want out? Their fights were almost pointless, as they tended to end with neither of them speaking through words and merely through glances and actions, which seemed to cut much deeper and explain a lot less. They looked at each other and at the floor at the same time as self doubt ran rampant through both of their heads. He knew full well what she was thinking. ‘He doesn’t need me. I hold him back.’ It was what she always thought, though he told her time and time again that it was the furthest thing from the truth. At the same time he was thinking of how he should’ve let her go, not let her choose him, which she had pointed out as blatantly false only moments before, so he couldn’t really ridicule her for her thoughts.

“I don’t want anything to do with that life anymore, Mulder.” Was the last thing she said to him, quietly and under her breath.

“I am that life, Scully.” Was all he could say back before their eyes met for a brief second, hers red and watery and his almost closed from the pressure of what they had just realized.

***

And that was it. She had turned her back and left and he stood in the same spot for longer then he cared to remember. She left everything behind; clothes, furniture, and anything else. And it all still remained where she had left it, including him, as he still waited for her to come home.

Walking back into the bedroom with a towel draped across his lower half he stared at their bed and thought about how it told so much about their relationship. His side was crinkled and unkempt, a jumbled mess of sheets; hers was tidy and straight, the pillows positioned perfectly over top of the tucked in comforter but underneath her sheets were jumbled too, but no one would ever know at first glance. He didn’t dare sleep on her side of the bed; felt it wrong to even think about it. He would just lingeringly look at it from time to time and even run a hand along the bumps imagining her still there. It took him almost 6 months to change the sheets; he could never bring himself to do it. Knew that once they were gone she would be gone too. The dent her head left on the pillow and the smell of her that lingered there. And it wasn’t just some fruity smell of shampoo or body lotion that thousands of husbands and boyfriends were privy too, it was just her smell. He couldn’t explain it but it was Scully and it kept him sane during the first while of their separation. Once he finally took them off it was excruciatingly painful, as if he was peeling off his own skin. He never washed them, just sat them in a pile beside the dryer. He slept on the couch for awhile after that because to him, the new crisp, clean white sheets felt dirtier to him than anything he had ever touched before.

The shrill of the alarm woke him out of his thoughts as he walked over to turn it off. He moved swiftly from his closet to his living room and kitchen, before grabbing his keys and heading out the same door she had 5 years ago.

Last Meme of the Night...hopefully :)

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 06:01:14 GMT

H'ok so, Emma tagged me in this and it has taken me until now to do it but here it is (and I lovest it, I must say)

List fifteen fictional characters you would make out with (or go all the way, if that's your thing) and tag five people to do the same.

1. Fox Mulder - X-Files (I would probably make out with Scully too but that should be left unsaid...)
2. Mark Sloan - Grey's Anatomy
3. Mick St.John - Moonlight
4. Edward Cullen - Twilight
5. Lestat - The Vampire Chronicles (ok yes, there is my vamp trifecta...I have a thing for them, whatcanisay.)
6. Warrick Brown - CSI (before he went all crazy and died of course)
7, Agent 47 - Hitman
8. Bruce Banner (the Edward Norton version) - The Incredible Hulk (sadly his heart rate problem would hinder this but it would be lovely for the 2.5 seconds it lasted)
9. Denny Duquette - Grey's Anatomy
10. Horatio Caine - CSI: Miami (oh ew, I know...but one of those one liners and I'd be butta)
11. Ric Lansing - General Hospital
12. The guy who holds up the sign in Love Actually...that moment is so awww cuteness
13. Link Larkin - Hairspray (guilty pleasure, had to do it)
14. Chuck Bass - Gossip Girl
15. Dexter - Dexter (oh Michael C. Hall and all his yumminess)

On to meme the second...

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 05:38:44 GMT

Yep, still bored...and I've been seeing these 'get to know your friends better' posty things around lately and melikes so I figured I would do it and post it here. You should do it to! :)

***
PERSONAL
1. Name: Stephanie
2. Birthday: February 22
3. Where do you live: Toronto, Canada
4: What are you studying/What are you working as: I’m a Forensic Science/Psychology major at the University of Toronto. And I work at a)police station (intern = no pay) and b) dance instructor.
5. What makes you happy: Lots of things currently. Finding new songs, the fast approaching of Mamma Mia and XF2..squee squee!!, summer and it's warmness...
6. What are you listening to now/have listened to last: Sway - The Perishers...found it during my iTunes song hunt tonight
7. What is particularly good/bad about my LJ: my new header is pretty...lol
9. Are you in love/have a crush at the moment: No one who is actual dateable/unfamous haha. Typical me, I know ;)
10. Favorite place to be: The Studio
11. Favorite lyric: Hmm, it seems to change all the time depending on my song of the moment. Right now I will say "you're like an indian summer in the middle of winter, like a heart candy with a surprise centre" from Katy P's "Thinking of You"
12. Best time of the year: June/July I enjoy. I like summer and no schoolness
13. Weirdest food you like: Hmm, I'm a pretty picky eater so I don't know if I like anything weird.

RECOMMEND
1. A film: In theates: Wanted. Rentable: Bridges of Madison County
2. A book: Birth of Venus...I love the Renaissance
3. A song: Again - Needtobreathe
4: A band: OneRepublic...don't judge them on Apologize (even thought it's the greatest song EVER :) )

FANDOMS
1. Favorite Fandom: X-Files and Grey's Anatomy but I have many.
2. OTP/OT3: My favie OTPs have to be Mulder/Scully and MickBeth <3
3. Icon/Fic Journal: Hmm, I pretty much peruse everywhere for icons or make them myself, though I'm not very good...ficwise, I rock at that ;)

Meming and other randomness

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 04:50:04 GMT

So, apparently I'm bored on a Monday night and decided to do a meme, or two, or three...depends how this one goes. I'm also trying to finish up my MS fic and fix up this livejournal page but anywho...memeing away.

SEVEN THINGS YOU WILL FIND IN YOUR ROOM:
1. Laptop
2. Bed
3. Benjamin Coiffin the Third aka my Dog :)
4. Meryl Streep picture
5. TV
6. The SJP Vogue issue that I have yet to read
7. My iPod and all it's accesories.

SEVEN RELATIONSHIP QUESTIONS:
1. Do you like anyone? Not particularily
2. Does someone like you? Maybe...could be a crush of some kind
3. Last kiss? April? May? Some drunken college night...lol
4. Been led on? Yeah
5. Been cheated on? No.
6. Want a relationship? Not looking for one but I wouldn't object
7. Wanna get married? One day

SEVEN THINGS YOU CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT:
1. Music
2. Friends
3. Laptop
4. TV Box sets (lifesavers...or boredom savers, same/diff)
5. Gum
6. Coconut-Lime body lotion
7. My imagination

SEVEN THINGS ON YOUR MIND:
1. How bad my neck hurts from laying down while typing
2. Not wanting to work tomorrow
3. Wondering how long it is going to take my XF Collector's DVDS to get here
4. I need to get my hands on Coldplay tickets
5. Summer should never end. Ever.
6. Mulder and Scully are THE definition of sexual tension and all things shipperness
7. Mamma Mia Soundtrack out tomorrow ahhhh!!!! Meryl Streep + showtunes = *dies*

SEVEN OTHER THINGS - DO YOU:
1. Believe in God? I believe in something, not sure what it is
2. Had a dream come true? Nothing mayjah but yes
3. Read the newspaper? Only during school
4. No 4?
5. Have a best friend? Of course. I have two and they are magnifique
6. Hold grudges? For short periods
7. Wish on stars? Did last week when I saw a shooting one

SEVEN HAVE YOU EVERS:
1. Fallen in love? I think it was love but I'm waiting to meet someone to prove me wrong
2. Kissed someone of the same sex? No
3. Hooked up with someone who had a gf/bf? Yes. Bad idea
4. Been to a bonfire? Of course I live in hicktown, what else is there to do?
5. Ran away from home? When I was little
6. Played strip poker? Yes, and lost
7. Pulled an all nighter? I do it quite often

SEVEN THINGS IN THE LAST 24 HOURS HAVE YOU:
1. Cried? Nope
2. Had fun? Haha yes, Dairy Queen + the playground = funness all around
3. Been hugged? No
4. Felt stupid? Yes
5. Talked to an ex? No
6. Missed someone? There is always someone missing
7. Listened to music? All the time

SEVEN BANDS YOU REALLY LIKE AT THE MOMENT:
1. Needtobreathe <3
2. Katy Perry
3. Adele
4. John Mayer
5. The Veronicas
6. The Perishers
7. OneRepublic - I never stop loving them

SEVEN SONGS RIGHT NOW:
1. Hometown Glory - Adele
2. Dreaming With A Broken Heart - John Mayer
3. Sway - The Perishers
4. Untouched - The Veronicas
5. Again - Needtobreathe
6. Thinking Of You - Katy Perry
7. Sleep - Meiko

SEVEN CONCERTS YOU WENT TO:
1. Spice Girls
2. Dashboard Confessional
3. Cher
4. City and Colour
5. The Killers
6. Hedley
7. fingereleven

SEVEN MOVIES YOU LOVE:
1. The Hours
2. Something's Gotta Give
3. Scotland, PA.
4. The Holiday
5. Bridges of Madison County
6. Hitman
7. In Her Shoes

Dancing With The Stars - Week 6

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 20:13:13 GMT

Alright, here is the next installement of my DWTS review. Hope I don't sounds crazy this time, heh :)

First and foremost there is something of the utmost importance that I have to address before anything else...

MEL AND MAKS COMING BACK MAY 6 FOR A NEW DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, you heard right. A new dance. I screamed when Tom said it and am now officially counting down to May 6. 13 days <3

Now, on to business.

Jason and Edyta:
I still absolutely adore these two, they make me so happy! This week they had the cha cha cha, and it wasn't bad but it wasn't Jason's best either. I thought he kept up extremely well with the fastpaced footwork and again, showing his beautiful Latin lines. Props to Edyta as well for adding more content this week, but in the end the more content showed his weaknesses. The judges scored him fairly and he is no doubt safe this week. Still bet on him to win the whole thing at this point. The two of them are just cuteness and are extremely personable. You can't help but like them! Oh, more props to Edyta for being the only female Pro to not look awkwardly spray tained while pulling off a bairly there pink number. You go girl!

Shannon and Derek:
Oh boy, here comes the rant. Shannon cannot dance! And I realize that is what the show is about, people who can't dance and yada yada yada, but they usually get better. Shannon hasn't. It's week 6 and I just think that, like last week, has not shown one ounce of growth so far over the competition. I thought their rumba lacked so many things to even list here. The chemistry didn't even do it for me. The choreography was all over the place and much too fast in parts for a Rumba. And she didn't listen to what the judges said last week about her hip movements and it happened again. That is one of the most important things in this competition, listen to LEN! I peg her bottom 2 tonight and also getting the boot. Sorry Derek, I tried! Also, this showmance thing between them? Ugh. Thanks ABC for forcing another awkward coupling on us. I see that relationship as completely fake. It isn't cute like Mark and Sabrina. It's forced and that makes them uncomfortable to watch. And can I just say I gave a clap to this..."Wow, you guys must be really good actors" Samantha Burn!!!!!! P.S. It's really sad when Samantha burns you, fyi.

Marlee and Fabian:
It was Mambo week with the Mambo King himself, and I don't know if Marlee quite made it to Mambo Queen, but she tried! Firstly, how hot does she look for a woman in her 40's who has 4 kids? She should've gotten extra points just for that outfit! OK, back to the dancing. I don't think she did as bad as the judges said she did at all. Obviously she looks a bit off at times, but I think she does remarkable. It didn't help that, again, their song sucked majorly. Overall, her posture does get me sometimes and make me go "ohhh" but she deserved more then a 7 for that Mambo. Bottom 2 for her tonight I predict, but I also think her fan base will pull her through. Hopefully.

C & C Ballroom Factory:
So I've finally finished laughing at Cheryl's horrendous feathered sleeves to comment on their dancing. I was actually impressed with Cristian this week. For once I actually liked him. He kept his posture in hold very well and his lines were impressive and overall he did a great job. I'm not really sure what else to say about these two this week cause usually I don't like him. I think they will escape the bottom 2 for once this week, which will probably be a nice change of pace for them. But a part of me does want to see them in the bottom 2 just because of Len's butt in the supermarket.

Kristi and Mark:
Ok, everyone ready for this? Favourite couple of the night!!!! They have officially grown on me, I'll admit it, damn it! Them dancing my favourite ballroom dance, the jive, helped them out this week. Kristi is truly what I talk about when I say someone who is growing and getting better. She was technically far far superior right out of the gate, but emotionally I feel like I have seen her open up more and more with each passing week and finally this week I think she crossed the final barrier. Their jive was incredible. Mark can choreograph like no one can. And is it wrong that I found him sexy in those glasses. haha. Definitely deserved the perfect score they we're given, but it wasn't my favourite dance of the season. That still goes to their Mambo that I thought was far supreme and fun. Glad to see Kristi finally come out and can't wait to see what she comes out with next.

Marissa and Tony:
Awww, my lovlies were good again this week! Actually, better then last week by a mile I thought. Marissa looked gorgeous this week, loved the hair. Tony choreographed this Waltz very, very well for Marissa and she really did look like a princess. Her hold was great, her lines were great, along with her turns and synchronicity with Tony. I would've never guessed this would be the dance that she would be best in, but I was very pleasantly surprised. The dancing almost overshadowed what was possibly THE WORST song choice in DWTS history. Good one Harold and the Gang, you really outdid yourself.

Mario and Karina:
These two are slightly growing on me as well. They have a good vibe going and I am slightly getting sucked into it. I thought their rumba was good...extremely sexy, but only good. Karina put in some cool little tricks here and there that kept me interested but I agree with Len in that it didn't tell a story of a romance, like it should. Bruno's 10 was too high, I think he got blinded by his love for Mario but that is okay. Can I also say that I found it funny that he dedicated the dance of love to his 9 year old brother?

The Group Dance:
I can't even really comment on this, I thought it was that horrendous. Christian Perry, what the hell was that? It was basically running around randomly and then going through a tunnel and ending with a trick. By far the weakest group dance I've seen. I'm praying that it isn't chosen for the encore tonight, but I know it will be. Standouts were Kristi/Mark and Jason/Edyta. But other then that it was a hot mess.

Marlee and Fabian Fan Forum!

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 00:01:01 GMT

Heyy! So I decided to make a Marlee and Fabian fan forum so if you are a fan and even if you aren't come and join lol!

http://z9.invisionfree.com/TeamFableeous/index.php

Thanks!! <3

Latin Week!

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 21:24:12 GMT

Made some more icons from Latin week. Hope you like!

More Season Sixness

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 22:32:54 GMT

Here is the latest batch...working on more from last night as we speak once ABC.com stops sucking.

Dancing With The Stars - Week 5

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 21:15:45 GMT

So, my page is boring so I've decided to write up reviews for the lovely DWTS each week so here is the first.

Mario and Karina:

By far his best dance so far. He definitely got his mojo back and was on track again this week. His hips moved effortlessly and he really flows through the music perfectly. To use Carrie Ann's favourite word aka the only real dance term she knows, his *musicality* is flawless, especially this week. Costumes...wow. Mario's wasn't too horrendous but Karina looked like the chicken nugget colored version of Big Bird with that dress. Gotta show off those abs though so more power to her. Music was typically horrendous, from the bad arrangement to the overall bad song for a Samba, it was too slow. Why couldn't Marlee get something like that?

Priscilla and Louis:

I honestly don't even know what to say about this dance except Louis Van Amstel you have severly disappointed me. For a man who is usually spoton for choreography this week he just fell really short. It was boring, too slow, awkward to watch and he made her do moves that a 60 year old woman just can't do. How odd was the slow split thing? And poor Priscilla, what a dreaded outfit they had her in. It looked like she was going to some grunge funeral, which she might actually be, dancing wise. I see these two getting the boot tonight as much as it pains me to say it.

Marissa and Tony:

YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!!! They were finally good! It is about damn time Tony! Had a massive smile on my face during this entire dance, Marissa was truly in her element. And she actually look fabulous for one! Shout out to the wardrobe department for that one! Though the steps were pretty basic and slightly cheesy, and their was more bouncing then was neccessary I am happy for the both of them. On a personal note, Len said she had "more bounce to the ounce" ahem! Mel had more bounce to the ounce with her Samba...cannot use M&M comments on other people! But if it was to be recycled on anyone, I'm glad it was Marissa.

Marlee and Fabian:

These two are love. Their chemistry is just smoking and it is because of that that Marlee's mistakes don't even matter. The Samba rhythm is extremely quick and shifty so I understand how hard it was for her this week but I still think she does a better job then people that can hear fine *cough* Shannon *cough*. Helped that they both looked super hot, always the greatest costumes those two have. Wardrobe and music must love them because they always get good choices. Props to Marlee for continuing on even when she brutally messed up, if I didn't know ballroom better I wouldn't have even noticed. Brava to you!

C&C Ballroom Factory (aka Christian and Cheryl)

He bores me. I can't help it. I love Cheryl but I don't think she is going to get mirrorball number 3 this season. I actually agreed with Carrie Ann for once last night (gah, I know). They had zero chemistry in my opinion...it was the most non-sexy rumba I think I have ever seen. And I don't buy the brother/sister excuse for the lack of hotness cause Derek and Jennie last season did a sizzling rumba and they were siblingish. Again, let down by these two, sadly. I think he will be bottom 3 tonight.

Kristi and Mark:

Technically: 10 Emotionally: 0

That is all. Glad they didn't get 30...last week was much better.

Shannon and Derek:

Oh Shannon Elizabeth, why can't I seem to like you? You have a nice personality and you try really hard but there is something about you that puts me off. Could be that you are rubbin all up on my Derek but we will leave that out of here. She can't dance, honestly. Her legs are lanky and awkward and her arms just kind dangle limply even when in hold. And her hips don't exist apparently. Sympathy points cause Derek was sick but I still don't think that fact alone had that much effect on what she did. Don't think she deserved the score she got, should've been lower. I say bottom 2 for her tonight. Hopefully not getting the boot though cause then my newly bought Team Hough shirt will totally go to waste.

Jason and Edyta:

Best rumba of the night. Best dance of the night. Those two just make me smile so much, I adore them. Between Edyta's fab choreography and Jason's impressive footwork and sensuality, they impressed me. And they are just so darn sexy/cute/gahhhh worthy together. Sure, Edyta posed but get over it Len. I liked it...the pros have to show off too. Hoping they get the encore tonight...they probably won't but they should. VOTE EDYTA AND JASON!!!! (Seriously, I'm not biased at all)

Spreading the Season 6 Love...

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 21:17:53 GMT

Made some Season 6 icons and banner. Feel free to use. Credit is nice but not neccessary. If you have a request I can do it too!

Twenty Questions

Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:26:03 GMT

Just realized that i was tagged by Tiff...so here it is!

20 Questions

1. If your lover betrayed you, what would your reaction be? Shock would probably be my first emotion, but I am a tough broad so I wouldn't
sit around and mope about it.

2. What will you do if you do not share the same feelings as the person who likes you? I would be honest. I've been in that situation before
and I know how much it sucks to be lead on by someone so I would tell them straight up.

3. Have you ever seen someone die? When I was driving home one night on the highway a car spun out of control and burst into flames right in front of me. The woman inside the car couldn't get out in time. Still gives me chills to this day.

4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you? Extremely. I am having a sort of quarter-life crisis right now. Not exactly sure if I am following the right career path or not. Its a bit scary.

5. What's your ideal lover like? Someone driven and determined and sense of humour is always something important. I am someone who puts my career goals first so I want someone that can support me and understand my work ethic and respect it. Having a wonderful voice and dancing skills would also earn extra points.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone else? Not too sure but I would probably have to say being loved, because without good love in your life I don't think you can truly love someone else.

7. If the person you like does not accept you, would you continue to wait for them to change their feelings? Been there and done that. I waited and it didn't pay off so I would never do it again. Hopefully.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do? See above answer cause it was the same circumstance lol. I didn't move on and it was a mistake but me being a hopeless romantic I might do the same again. It would depend on if the person was truly happy with their spouse and whether or not I felt there was really something there. Sort of just contradticted myself, oh well lol.

9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy recently? I HATE winter, mmkay?

10. What do you want most in life? I want to achieve everything I have set out for myself and be successful in my career. Being an inspiration for people as those who have inspired me have done is my ultimate goal.

11. Which of the 7 Deadly Sins do you think you relate to the most & why? Not happy to admit it but it is probably Pride. I have a mean cocky streak that I am not proud of.

12. If you find out that your best friend is going out with your boyfriend/girlfriend, how would you react? Again, been there done that. Wow I have awesome luck with men, probably explains why I am so bitter haha. It hurt but I moved on, she is too important to me to lose over a guy. Hoes before Bros I say.

13. Who is currently the most important person to you? My little sis. She looks up to me so much and keeps my grounded. I love her to pieces. And one of my high school teacher's whom now is a best friend. Has always believed in me and is the only one who can do a mean kareoke duet with me on Friday nights. &hearts; Connie!

14. What kind of person do you think you are? Witty. I try to keep a light hearted view on life. Extremely dedicated and passionate and would defend my beliefs till the end. My friends would probably say I'm a bit of a diva, but in a good way.

15. Do you believe there is nothing higher than human kind? I don't really know. I believe in science and progress for the most part but a part of me still thinks there is something spiritual out there, just not sure what it is.

16. If the person you secretly like cannot recognise you, what would you do/how would you react? Umm. I don't get it.

17. Would you give your all in a relationship? Eventually. I put up walls so if someone breaks them down they deserve my everything.

18. Do you have a motto? If yes which one? "The most important history is the one we are making today" - Meredith Grey

19. What type of friends do you like? I like to associate people who are driven and passionate about life, it is too short to waste on meaningless stuff. My friends would probably be best described by the words random and awkward haha, we just like to have lots of fun. Shy people bore me, I need people who aren't afraid of anything and take risks constantly in life.

20. Do you have an all time favorite song? Sunday Morning - Maroon 5 and In Your Eyes - Ben Harper. La Vie Boheme from Rent also holds a special place in my heart.

Musical Fun

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 04:32:42 GMT

Stolen from Linds fountnofthought :)

List 5 songs you can't stop listening to right now
- With:
* a picture that represents the song
* your favorite line in the song
* why you like it so much

Time After Time - Quiet Drive
Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick and think of you,
Caught up in circles, confusion is nothing new.
-I always love a good cover and this is one of the best I've heard in awhile. Its from the Prom Night trailer and it caught my attention as soon as I heard the musical interlude and I have loved it ever since!

After Tonight - Justin Nozuka
Come away with me, just for one night, no one will ever know,
Darlin, i will leave you satisfied, forever pass time,
You don't have to hide, you're free to fly
-Had to have some lovely Canadian talent in here. This song is beautiful, from the guitar to the lyrics, it took me like 10 minutes to pick my fav! Just sheer pretty all around.

Better That We Break - Maroon 5
I never knew perfection till i heard you speak,
And now it kills me just to hear you say the simple things,
Now waking up is hard to do, sleeping's impossible too,
Everything's reminding me of you,
Oh, what can I do?
-Maroon 5 kinda owns my soul. Every song they have ever sung makes me melt, and it is this one right now I am loving. Also is a great inspiration for the chapter I am working on right now which doesn't hurt!

With You - Chris Brown
Cause if I got you,
I don't need money, I don't need cars,
Girl your my all.

I bet there's heart's all over the world tonight with the love of they life,
Who feel what I feel when I'm with you.
-This song makes me happy and it was the latest fic inspiration for the one I just wrote. If Maks was a brotha, this would be his jam!

Personal Jesus - Depeche Mode
Feeling unknown and you're all alone,
Flesh and bone by the telephone,
Pick up the reciever I'll make you a believer.
Reach out and touch faith.
-What can I say? I've been in the Tango mood lately :)

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 06:39:47 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: Dare You To Move
Part: Chapter 4
Rating: PG
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: Maks and Geri have a semi-heart to heart, and Maks' plan is put into motion
Comments: 2 updates in one night, I know. I just had a bit of a writing spree partially egged on by the M&M girlies but I deserved it haha! Comments are always wonderful!
*insert disclaimer here*

Chapter 4

The hour was almost up and in that time he had witnessed the four Spice women turn into giggling and gossiping 16 year olds. The worst part was he was kind of enjoying it. Maks had never really had the chance to talk about Mel with anyone before, and though picking her best friends with whom she made him promise he would never shed one detail about them let alone confess his love may have not been the best choice, it was still nice. He realized that he would probably regret sharing all of this but to be honest he didn’t care. He liked talking about her, he loved talking about her. He loved her. Maks loves Mel and he was starting to love the sound of that. After the initial shock the girls continued their pounce on him, all sat intently on the floor like they were at a slumber party. The questions ranged from what his favourite thing about her was to the details about his plan for tonight. He knew they were testing him but his answers flowed freely and he only spoke what he felt. It seemed to be working well so far. His phone vibrated suddenly, interrupting the brigade.

“Hello. Oh hey Mel.”

A loud conjunctive British “ooooh” came from in front of him at the mention of her name which caused Maks to stifle a laugh and place a finger to his mouth to shush the girls.

“Nothing, just the radio. No, no that’s cool. Don’t worry. I’ll be here, I’ll wait all night. Okay. See you soon.” He hung up the phone and placed it back on the table.

“So, what did she say?” Victoria asked, bouncing in her spot.

“She said that she is running a bit late but will be here in 10 minutes. Which means you all have to leave,” Maks answered, placing a comical frown on his face after the last comment.

“Aww, do we have to?” Emma pleaded as he nodded his head yes.

“You know she will kill us all if she finds you in here,” he said with a laugh.

“Alright girls, lets go,” Geri said, ushering the group out the door, mouthing something to them that he couldn’t catch as she shut the door, leaving only her and Maks in the room.

“I’m worried about the two of you,” she said turning to him, a more serious look on her face.

“Why?” he asked, confused.

“She really cares about you, so much that she doesn’t even have to tell me. It is written all over her. I’ve never seen her like this before and it scares me a little. You have to be careful with her. She’s been through a lot.”

“I know.”

“No, that’s just it. You don’t. Don’t get me wrong Maks, I think you’re lovely. But I know your personality and you have to give her time,” she continued, placing her hands on Maks’ crossed arms.

“It’s hard, Geri, seeing her with him. I don’t want to hurt her but I can’t walk away. I don’t know what to do,” Maks admitted, hanging his head.

“Listen to me. She doesn’t love Stephan, that much I can tell you. And she may be stubborn but not stupid. It’ll happen Maks, trust me,” Geri said, sending a comfort through him. “Well I better go, she’ll be here soon. Have fun tonight,” she continued, opening the door.

“Thank you,” Maks quietly said to her on her way out, getting a nodding smile as a reply. Geri was right and he knew it. The giving time thing, it would happen. He just wasn’t sure how. Mel appeared in the door frame what felt like only seconds later as Maks jumped out of his seat.

“I caught Geri coming out of here. What were you two talking about?” she asked, leaning against the door frame. God, she was beautiful.

“You know, hitting on me like usual. But I told her I was only man enough for one Spice Girl at a time and that she would have to wait till I was done with you,” Maks said casually, not being able to hold in his laughter as Mel’s mouth widened and then squished into a pout. He couldn’t stand to not touch her any longer, grabbing her hand and intertwining his fingers with hers, “Don’t worry. She would be waiting forever,” he whispered, “Now let’s go. I have something to show you.” Mel bit her lip, blushing a little and followed Maks down the hall, hand in hand.

The drive was short and silent, Maks’ hand on her thigh and sharing the odd glance with each other. As he pulled up to their destination Maks expected the confused look that crossed Mel’s face.

“A studio?” she asked as they walked to the door.

“Just wait and see,” Maks said, smiling as he led her inside and up the stairs. As they turned the corner, his face lit up as he saw her reaction to what he had planned. The room was filled with candlelight cascading off the view of the city and it immediately felt like home with her there.

He missed a lot of things about her. The laughter, the way she made him smile and how he could talk with her for hours about nothing. But there was one thing he missed more then all the rest, the thing that was most important in his life. Stepping in front of her he extended his hand,

“Dance with me, Mel.”

Dare You To Move

Sat, 02 Feb 2008 03:23:20 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: Dare You To Move
Part: Chapter 3
Rating: PG
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: A little Spice Girls fun...
Comments: Dedicated to my M&M board girls for being so lovely and fun! Feedback is always appreaciated!
*insert disclaimer here*

( Chapter 3 )

Dare You To Move

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 03:07:12 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: Dare You To Move
Part: Chapter 2
Rating: PG
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: M&M meet up in Vegas
Comments: Thank you all for the warm reception of the sequel! I'm having a lot of fun writing this one and I hope you are having fun reading it! Feedback is always lovely.

( Chapter 2 )

Dare You To Move

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 01:14:14 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: Dare You To Move
Part: Chapter 1
Rating: PG
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: M&M deal with distance
Comments: This is the sequel to The Fear You Won't Fall and it is going to be a lot more fun and light then its counterpart haha but i'll be sure to throw some cliffhangers and angst in there just because its me ;-) Hope you all enjoy and comments are love, as always!

( Chapter 1 )

The Fear You Won't Fall

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 01:13:39 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: The Fear You Won't Fall
Part: Chapter 13
Rating: PG
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: M&M say goodbye
Comments: Well here it is, the final chapter! A HUGE thank you to all of you for reading and supporting it from the beginning. Your feedback has been nothing short of amazing and I wouldn't have been able to write it without you! Special shout out to Tiff for your editing and dealing with me during my trying times, haha! Hope you all enjoy the final chap and the sequel will be along soon! &hearts;
*insert disclaimer here*

( Chapter 13 )

Mon, 21 Jan 2008 04:43:11 GMT

Author: QueenBallroom
Title: The Fear You Won't Fall
Part: Chapter 12
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Mel and Maks
Summary: The drama finally ends!! :)
Comments: Well, its coming to a close. I think the next chapter will be the last. Thank you for sticking around and reading 12 chapters later lol. I am thinking about a sequel, so let me know your thoughts on a Part 2!
*insert disclaimer here*

Chapter 12

Maks awoke on the couch as the sounds of loud banging filled his apartment. Sitting up he looked towards the door, wondering who could possibly be knocking furiously at the other side. “Alright, I’m coming!” Maks groaned out as he got up and made his way over to the other side of the living room. Running his hand down his bare chest he opened the door and was surprised to see who was on the other side. “Mel? What are you doing here?” he asked, rubbing his eyes.

“I came to bring back your sweater.”

“Are you aware that it’s 3:00 in the morning?”

“Yes, I know. I just thought you…might be cold,” Mel answered as she walked past him into the room.

Maks studied her as she moved across his apartment. Her face was flushed, lips full and bare of all makeup. He could tell she had been crying. It had only been 3 hours since they last saw each other but it had felt like forever. He was glad to see her but afraid of what would happen next. Walking towards her he grabbed her hand, “Mel, what are you really doing here?”

“I don’t know,” her hand squeezed his before she let it go and made her way to the couch. She sat down and pulled the pillow his head had been on moments before into her lap, hugging it close to her as she brought her knees to her chest. “I went back to Sabrina’s to get my car and drove around for awhile, but for some reason I kept ending up here,” Mel admitted, resting her chin against the pillow and inhaling deeply.

She seemed so lost curled up on his couch, like a small child who couldn’t find their mother. It made his heart break and he felt as helpless as she looked as he joined her on the couch, sitting at the opposite end. They sat in silence though Maks had many things to say. So many thoughts were running through his mind but he wasn’t sure what to do. There were two routes he could take: strike up a pointless conversation and forget any of this ever happened or finally man up and tell her how he feels. Either way he could end up losing her forever and that scared him more then anything else. Maks’ heart began pounding as he knew which option he was going to choose. Turning towards Mel he opened his mouth to speak but she beat him to it.

“What are we doing Maks?”

“I’m not sure. But I don’t want it to end,” he confessed, looking at Mel whose gaze stayed towards her lap. Maks reached over and grabbed the end of the pillow, gently pulling it away from her and dropping it on the floor. A shiver ran through her body as she immediately missed the warmth, wrapping her arms around herself. They had been here before, he thought. She had sat like that weeks ago and he had wanted nothing more then to tell her how he felt. But he hadn’t, he had let her go. Not this time.

“Stay with me tonight,” Maks whispered, his eyes pleading to her even more then his words.

“I want to,” she cautiously answered, looking up at him.

“Then do it. Please, stay with me Mel. We don’t have much time left.” The emotions in his voice ran high washing over Mel as she shifted closer to him, placing each hand on a knee.

“Okay. We have to talk about us,” she said as Maks closed the space on the couch between them.

“I know. But there is something I need to do first.”

Before Mel could protest his lips were on hers, a surge of energy shooting through his entire body. It was slow at first as Maks reacquainted himself with her, pulling her lips into his mouth, savouring the way they felt against his. Her fingers intertwined themselves into his hair, quickening the pace and letting him know that it was alright to let his tongue join the exploration. Maks felt Mel pull back but she brought him with her as she laid back onto the couch. Her tongue was as good at the Tango as her feet were as she teased him, but never letting his mouth leave hers. As if she had read his mind her left leg wrapped tightly around his hips pressing his barely restrained erection against her. He inhaled a sharp breath as her hips raised to meet his, grinding tightly against him. His lips moved down to her exposed neck, trailing up and down as his bare chest rubbed against hardened nipples. His hands made their way to the front of her shirt, playing with the buttons as he slowly began undoing each one.

“Maks, please,” she begged, her hands trying to join his to help him go faster.

“I thought…you…wanted to…talk,” he asked in between each kiss he left along her collar bone.

“Fuck talking,” she groaned as her fingers sunk aggressively into his back.

A throaty laugh escaped against her skin as he removed her shirt and threw it to the floor. Maks made his way back to her lips and he was still in shock that she was letting this happen, that she wanted it to happen. Their bodies were entangled together and his head was spinning so much that he wasn’t sure where her body began and his ended. The pieces of fabric separating them were obviously driving her crazy as she pushed him upwards and got off the couch.

He was out of breath as he stared at her, his body immediately missing her warmth. Their lustful eyes never left each as she undid her pants and slid them down slowly, revealing the black lace hidden underneath. He couldn’t help but lick his lips as she moved closer to him, her legs on either side of his. Moving forward he ran his hands down her flat stomach and began trailing kisses along the edge of her panties. He wanted to make this last, relish in every second of it but the smell of her intoxicated him and he gripped her waist tightly, pulling her on top of him.

Their lips crashed together again as her hands unclasped her bra, letting it fall into their laps. “Mel…” he whispered against her mouth as her bare chest pressed against his. Running his hands through her hair he pulled her face back off of his and looked into her beautiful eyes. His hands clasped the sides of her face making sure she didn’t move as she trailed a finger down his chiselled abs. He wanted to tell her now. He had to tell her. “Maks?” her voice rang out as she looked at him. Taking a deep breath he smiled at her and rested his forehead gently against hers.

“Mel. I love you,” he breathed against her.

She was silent for a moment, which made him nervous. He felt her hand graze gently across his cheek as she moved forward, touching her lips to his. Maks stood up, her legs and lips still wrapped around him.

He didn’t need an answer. He didn’t expect one. As he carried her off to his bedroom all he wanted was her.

The Fear You Won't Fall

Sat, 19 Jan 2008 05:59:54 GMT

Chapter 11

The club was dark and heavy with people laughing and dancing, all of whom made Mel feel somewhat ill. She hadn’t moved from the corner booth in the hour they had been there, sitting with her arms and legs crossed, making sure to look happy whenever Sabrina would shoot her a glance. Mark and Derek had met them there and whisked their favourite girl off to the dance floor almost immediately. Mel watched the couple escape into their own world, eyes and hands never leaving each other. The two of them stood out in the crowd, both because of their comfort on the dance floor and with each other. They were truly in love and though Mel was happy for her friends, seeing them together only made her feel more alone. Mel felt the sudden urge to get some air and as she mouthed her intentions to Sabrina, headed towards the back exit. The night air was refreshing as she took a deep breath and leaned against the wall. As the breeze began to blow she undid the first few buttons on the top of her shirt, slightly exposing the lace underneath. Mel shut her eyes as the cool air trailed across her bare skin, sighing as a slight shiver ran through her body.

“You are going to catch a cold out here if you don’t put some clothes on,” a familiar voice rang out from the other side of the door. Mel’s eyes shot open as she looked over at her dance partner who held out his sweater towards her. “Normally I wouldn’t complain about a woman taking her shirt off but I need you healthy for the semi-finals,” Maks continued, a small smile crossing his face.

“What are you doing here?” Mel asked, taking the sweater and quickly sliding it over her head, the lingering smell and warmth of him enveloping her entire body.

“Same reason you’re here,” he answered, joining her against the wall with his hands restrained behind his back.

“And what would that be?”

Maks took a moment before answering, shifting his weight to his left foot and looking down towards the ground.

“Trying to forget about you.”

Mel couldn’t help but let out a nervous laugh and she turned her body so she could look up at him and see the honest answer to the question she was about to ask, “Did it work?”

Maks twisted so that his body mimicked the position of Mel’s as his eyebrow arched and his hand tugged at the side of his sweater that was miles too big on her small frame but at the same time fit her perfectly. “Let’s go for a walk”

“I don’t know, it’s the middle of the night and Sabrina…”

“Sorry to break it to you but unless your name is Mark Ballas, she won’t notice a thing,”

Mel couldn’t help but agree with that as she nodded her head, “Alright. But where are we going to go?”

As soon as the words came out of Mel’s mouth a grin appeared on Maks' as he grabbed her hand and headed towards the street, “I have an idea.”

------------------------

After what seemed like hours of walking the two stopped in front of a building, just as Mel thought her feet were permanently damaged from excessive stiletto abuse. She cocked her head at Maks as she noticed the familiar place in front of them, “The dance studio? But, how are we supposed to get in?” Mel asked.

“Ballroom dancing does have its perks,” Maks retorted as he pulled a set of keys from his jean pocket and proceeded to unlock the door. “After you.”

Mel rolled her eyes as she passed him, but bit her lip as she headed up the stairs. Smug was so sexy on him.

As they reached their studio Maks passed the door, “You go on in, I’ll be there in a second. Just have to check something out first.” And with that he disappeared around the dark corner.

Mel walked into the room, opting to leave the lights off as the brightness of the city shone in through the glass windows. The familiar sound of her shoes against the floor made her feel calm and she understood why this was one of Maks’ favourite places. Pulling off the sweater and moving to the centre of the room, she slowly began the Mambo footwork he had taught her earlier in the week as the competitor in her took over. She felt his presence in the room but she kept going, wanting to impress him with her quickly learned precision. She heard his chuckle close behind her, “As much as your practicing thrills me it isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”

Mel heel-turned toward him, “Well, what exactly do you want from me?” She instantly regretted the statement as it came out much more playfully then she expected.

“Nothing. I just want you,” he whispered as his hands made their way to his favourite spot.

“Maks, stop. Please. We have to talk about this,” Mel pleaded, her body motionless.

“Talk about what? We are just having some fun. Meaningless fun,” Maks said as he tried to close the gap between them. Mel’s hands pressed against his chest and roughly pushed him away.

“Will you stop saying that! You being an asshole about it doesn’t make it meaningless,” she yelled, moving away from him and crossing her arms tight against her chest.

“Right. Cause this is all my fault,” Maks said quietly, his anger rising as he stared blankly into the city.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You know exactly what it means. Everyone is all ‘boo-hoo poor Mel, fallen for the charms of Maksim’, but what about me?”

Mel went to open her mouth to respond but Maks wasn’t about to let that happen.

“No, you are going to listen. You stand there everyday, flirting and playing this game without ever thinking about what it is doing to me. You let me go this far and develop these feelings for you and placed an idea in my head that maybe, just maybe, you felt the same and we could make it work. But the truth is that you are married and are leaving for another country in two weeks and will forget all about this and me and us and guess who is going to be alone? So stop playing the victim in this situation because you have no idea what I’m going through” Maks finished, out of breath and red in the face.

Mel wasn’t in the mood for a fight but she figured it was now or never.

“No idea what you are going through? You have to be joking. I am married, that you got right, but it certainly does not make things easier for me. You can’t possibly imagine what I feel, Maks. You can’t imagine what it is like to be thinking of another man every time your husband touches you. You can’t imagine lying to your children when they ask you why you spend so much time away from home. And you certainly can’t imagine regretting marriage so much that is makes you sick.” The tears began welling up in Mel’s eyes and she was startled at how close Maks had gotten to her as she glanced at him.

“Stop looking at me like that,” she whispered as she blinked back the tears.

“Like what?” Maks asked, his voice gentle and soothing, which made her even more emotional.

“Like you always do. I think I’m doing fine and then you look at me and I feel so beautiful and comfortable and…Stephan, he doesn’t look at me like that. But you,” Mel smiled as her voice cracked, “You make me feel like I can do anything. Nobody has ever made me feel like that before.”

The tears flowed freely down her face now as she hung her head. As soon as she finished Maks' fingers tilted her head back up as his brown eyes melted with hers.

“I truly believe you can do anything because you are passionate,” his hand moved to her cheek, wiping away a tear, “And beautiful,” continuing across her face, he tucked her hair behind her ear, “And you deserve to feel like that every day.”

The butterflies in her stomach fluttered in full force as she placed her hand on top of his. Mel’s face moved slowly towards Maks’, their lips almost touching. As he moved to kiss her she turned her head, placing her lips beside his ear. Her cheek nuzzled his as she whispered,

“I wish I was allowed to fall in love with you.”

With that she moved away from him, grabbing his sweater and pulling it over her head again. As she walked out the door she thought she heard a barely audible ‘Me too’ come from his lips but she wasn’t sure and wasn’t ready to find out.